Dear Friends and Family,
I have started a new blog! Please follow it:
http://tapestrychronicles.wordpress.com/
Love to you all! I'll be closing this one down in a week or two.
Love,
Vanessa
23 March 2014
13 April 2013
Almost There
This time next month I'll be a Mrs.!!
Life has been exciting, stressful, busy and demanding. Lots of changes have occurred at work and lots more are about to take place! It's crazy to think of what life is going to be like this time next year, I'm sure it will be interesting to look back and see how everything turns out. For those of you that don't know, I was supposed to be deploying this past month with my unit, however, by the Grace of God and my superiors, they allowed me to stay behind to get married and only go for the second half of the deployment.
I have learned so much about myself and other people in this job, and while it can get frustrating and exhausting I am learning a lot of valuable lessons that I know I can carry with me to my next stage in life. One of the biggest lessons that I can tell thus far is my confidence. My confidence has definitely grown over the past few months (make that 16 months). Time really does fly!
I am blessed to have great bosses and coworkers. I can definitely say that I wouldn't want to be in any other job (especially after experiencing working with those other agencies... no one quite does it like aircraft maintenance and we are definitely the tip of the spear). While we may work anywhere from 10-14 hour days 5-6 days a week, we make the mission happen and without us "Pilots are just guys with aviators." ;)
On to other news, as a result of my upcoming deployment, Micah and I will be having our "official" wedding ceremony in May (May 13 to be exact) in order to get the ball rolling, spend some time together and get the legal paperwork done in time for me to change my name and update our life as a married couple! We will still be having our ceremony in June as originally planned but we are going to focus on it being a celebration of renewing our vows in front of family and friends since only our immediate family and Pastor Arch will be at our May ceremony.
Anywho, we are incredibly excited even though we won't have that much time together before I have to leave to another country for 3-4 months but we will hopefully have the holidays together (the first time since we've started dating...) and we will finally be in the same place for more than 3 days at a time since 2011 :) Words cannot express how excited we are for the challenge of marriage and learning and growing together as a couple. We are looking forward to the future and what God has in store!
Not to mention, we also look forward to seeing friends and family that we haven't seen in a very long time! It will be over a year for me!
Life has been exciting, stressful, busy and demanding. Lots of changes have occurred at work and lots more are about to take place! It's crazy to think of what life is going to be like this time next year, I'm sure it will be interesting to look back and see how everything turns out. For those of you that don't know, I was supposed to be deploying this past month with my unit, however, by the Grace of God and my superiors, they allowed me to stay behind to get married and only go for the second half of the deployment.
I have learned so much about myself and other people in this job, and while it can get frustrating and exhausting I am learning a lot of valuable lessons that I know I can carry with me to my next stage in life. One of the biggest lessons that I can tell thus far is my confidence. My confidence has definitely grown over the past few months (make that 16 months). Time really does fly!
I am blessed to have great bosses and coworkers. I can definitely say that I wouldn't want to be in any other job (especially after experiencing working with those other agencies... no one quite does it like aircraft maintenance and we are definitely the tip of the spear). While we may work anywhere from 10-14 hour days 5-6 days a week, we make the mission happen and without us "Pilots are just guys with aviators." ;)
On to other news, as a result of my upcoming deployment, Micah and I will be having our "official" wedding ceremony in May (May 13 to be exact) in order to get the ball rolling, spend some time together and get the legal paperwork done in time for me to change my name and update our life as a married couple! We will still be having our ceremony in June as originally planned but we are going to focus on it being a celebration of renewing our vows in front of family and friends since only our immediate family and Pastor Arch will be at our May ceremony.
Anywho, we are incredibly excited even though we won't have that much time together before I have to leave to another country for 3-4 months but we will hopefully have the holidays together (the first time since we've started dating...) and we will finally be in the same place for more than 3 days at a time since 2011 :) Words cannot express how excited we are for the challenge of marriage and learning and growing together as a couple. We are looking forward to the future and what God has in store!
Not to mention, we also look forward to seeing friends and family that we haven't seen in a very long time! It will be over a year for me!
Can't wait!
24 February 2013
Bringing it Back
Family and Friends,
I know I've been silent for quite a while on here... very silent. One of my goals before marriage is to come up with a sort of theme or purpose for my blog so that I have some sort of standard to follow.
In addition to spinning up for some things at work, life has been busy. The Lord has definitely been teaching me A LOT this past year and some since being in Georgia and starting a "new life".
My next post will be a brief synopsis of what has been going on in my life so that everyone can get caught up :)
Stay tuned!
I know I've been silent for quite a while on here... very silent. One of my goals before marriage is to come up with a sort of theme or purpose for my blog so that I have some sort of standard to follow.
In addition to spinning up for some things at work, life has been busy. The Lord has definitely been teaching me A LOT this past year and some since being in Georgia and starting a "new life".
My next post will be a brief synopsis of what has been going on in my life so that everyone can get caught up :)
Stay tuned!
14 July 2012
Healing
I'm not quite sure where to begin, so I'll start off by saying that life has been a whirlwind these past few months. There is so much I want to say...
March 2013
During the rigors of AMOC, I had to deal with my Grandmother (Nanay's) impending death. Since I was her next of kin, I had to make all of the decision based on her health. I had to be excused from AMOC to come back home and visit her.
I flew back home in a whirlwind of trial. I arrived on a Wednesday and went to visit her in the hospital on Thursday. She died that day. I couldn't talk to her, or hear her voice because she was sedated to help protect her against the pain. The situation as all too familiar to me. I wanted to vomit the whole time I was there. I hate hospitals. I'm just glad I was able to be there with my Grandma.
I had to make the decision of whether or not to "pull the plug".
There were three potential situations for her:
1. Keep her on the ventilator. If I did this, she would have to stay in a hospice or 24/7 care facility.
2. Give her a tracheotomy. It would be the same as above and she would not be able to talk etc.
3. Take her off of the ventilator completely and see if she can survive without it. The chances of that happening were slim to none.
I went with #3 because I knew she would hate life if she were to live like a vegetable and I couldn't see her that way. She lasted less than an hour. I was the only person with her when she died. She squeezed my hand one last time and I saw her take her final breath.
It was too much. All too familiar. The sights, sounds and smells of the hospital room. It made me feel like I was my 9 year old self.
I pray I never have to go through it again.
The following days are a blur. We had a small memorial service for her in the same funeral home that my Mom's was in. You can imagine how unpleasant and eerie that was. I told myself I was never going to set foot in that place ever again after my Mom's death. That didn't happen.
I had to fly back to Texas, grab my car and drive back to Georgia and stay there for 3 weeks until I had to drive back to Texas to finish my training.
So I drove back to Texas. Finished my training. And drove back to Georgia.
While it has almost been 4 months since she died, I still haven't grieved completely over her death. I believe it's in large part because I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if I do, it will open up the floodgates of the memories of my Mother's death because they were similar. I have agreed to get some counseling done with my Pastor here in Georgia. There is a lot of hurt and pain that I haven't straightened out yet. That goes back many many years that I haven't faced. Mostly because of fear. Fear that will incapacitate me. I believe I'm fairly open with my past, but I haven't completely been free of it. I want to be free of it. I want to heal. Finally. After almost 15 years of pain, anger and hurt... I want to be healed.
I'll update with the other months at a later time...
March 2013
During the rigors of AMOC, I had to deal with my Grandmother (Nanay's) impending death. Since I was her next of kin, I had to make all of the decision based on her health. I had to be excused from AMOC to come back home and visit her.
I flew back home in a whirlwind of trial. I arrived on a Wednesday and went to visit her in the hospital on Thursday. She died that day. I couldn't talk to her, or hear her voice because she was sedated to help protect her against the pain. The situation as all too familiar to me. I wanted to vomit the whole time I was there. I hate hospitals. I'm just glad I was able to be there with my Grandma.
I had to make the decision of whether or not to "pull the plug".
There were three potential situations for her:
1. Keep her on the ventilator. If I did this, she would have to stay in a hospice or 24/7 care facility.
2. Give her a tracheotomy. It would be the same as above and she would not be able to talk etc.
3. Take her off of the ventilator completely and see if she can survive without it. The chances of that happening were slim to none.
I went with #3 because I knew she would hate life if she were to live like a vegetable and I couldn't see her that way. She lasted less than an hour. I was the only person with her when she died. She squeezed my hand one last time and I saw her take her final breath.
It was too much. All too familiar. The sights, sounds and smells of the hospital room. It made me feel like I was my 9 year old self.
I pray I never have to go through it again.
The following days are a blur. We had a small memorial service for her in the same funeral home that my Mom's was in. You can imagine how unpleasant and eerie that was. I told myself I was never going to set foot in that place ever again after my Mom's death. That didn't happen.
I had to fly back to Texas, grab my car and drive back to Georgia and stay there for 3 weeks until I had to drive back to Texas to finish my training.
So I drove back to Texas. Finished my training. And drove back to Georgia.
While it has almost been 4 months since she died, I still haven't grieved completely over her death. I believe it's in large part because I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if I do, it will open up the floodgates of the memories of my Mother's death because they were similar. I have agreed to get some counseling done with my Pastor here in Georgia. There is a lot of hurt and pain that I haven't straightened out yet. That goes back many many years that I haven't faced. Mostly because of fear. Fear that will incapacitate me. I believe I'm fairly open with my past, but I haven't completely been free of it. I want to be free of it. I want to heal. Finally. After almost 15 years of pain, anger and hurt... I want to be healed.
I'll update with the other months at a later time...
06 May 2012
Motherhood Is a Calling (And Where Your Children Rank) - Desiring God
Motherhood Is a Calling (And Where Your Children Rank) - Desiring God
This was very convicting to me and felt led to share it. What a wonderful reminder or dying to self and clinging to the cross for everything. Letting go and letting God.
This was very convicting to me and felt led to share it. What a wonderful reminder or dying to self and clinging to the cross for everything. Letting go and letting God.
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